So finally, this year has come to an end. I guess I've pretty much not accomplished anything even though I started working. Many many things have happened and I'm glad I've survived through the stormy days. And now, although I've not become stronger but I'm definitely better.
Next year will be better! ;)
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Sleepless night
Ok this really sucks because i cant get to sleep and it's getting so frustrating. Tossing and turning around for God knows how long already.
Sigh, made me really think back of the past and got reminded of all the hurtful and painful memories i had before - none of which i could feel happy or blissful about. Had it made me become who i am today, stronger and braver? I dont know, i guess i'm more to being numb from feelings and emotions.
It's really sad that im so out of touch with society and my social circle is shrinking to nearly a dot. I used to know many ppl, hang out with many ppl and having a life that is happening and unpredictable, but its so different now. Not that i love knowing people, im still super anti social but it sucks to feel lonely sometimes.
It sucks when everyone else around you is getting attached, all but me. It sucks when you see ur ex doing well and having an enjoyable time. It sucks having to feel alone. I know i dont deserve to say these things bcos i chose it myself, but what can i do?
I tell myself that i can still be happy being single and alone. I dont believe in relationships and marriages because everyone's so selfish you dont know if they are real or fake. And the truth is i cant see myself loving someone. I dont know how to love someone normally and properly. I have lost the capability of having everything that is normal in this life.
Ok i guess i'm just as unhappy as always.
That's why i hate it when i cant get to sleep. The emo mind comes out and damn, it gets so frustrating.
Sigh, made me really think back of the past and got reminded of all the hurtful and painful memories i had before - none of which i could feel happy or blissful about. Had it made me become who i am today, stronger and braver? I dont know, i guess i'm more to being numb from feelings and emotions.
It's really sad that im so out of touch with society and my social circle is shrinking to nearly a dot. I used to know many ppl, hang out with many ppl and having a life that is happening and unpredictable, but its so different now. Not that i love knowing people, im still super anti social but it sucks to feel lonely sometimes.
It sucks when everyone else around you is getting attached, all but me. It sucks when you see ur ex doing well and having an enjoyable time. It sucks having to feel alone. I know i dont deserve to say these things bcos i chose it myself, but what can i do?
I tell myself that i can still be happy being single and alone. I dont believe in relationships and marriages because everyone's so selfish you dont know if they are real or fake. And the truth is i cant see myself loving someone. I dont know how to love someone normally and properly. I have lost the capability of having everything that is normal in this life.
Ok i guess i'm just as unhappy as always.
That's why i hate it when i cant get to sleep. The emo mind comes out and damn, it gets so frustrating.
Sunday, December 09, 2012
Morning reflection.
We can't balance anything in our life. If you choose something, you have to give up something else in return. That's how life changes.
Saturday, December 08, 2012
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