Frankly speaking, I am still feeling lousy.

Everything is still so hard.

Feelings are real, emotions are real.

I wished I could share your life with you too.

All that's in my mind is you.

So tired, physically and mentally.

School ended early, there was no cell so i went shopping.

Spent a bomb...but at least felt better after that.

Maybe spending money really does help sometimes to relief stress and stuffs.

Weekend is here...but it doesn't make any difference.

Still doing the same things, still thinking about the the same thing...

Still, the same.

I found, but...

Today, my tutor said (to the ladies) that in life, it is better to know a few assholes because then you can know if you have found the good one.

Although there are external changes, but internal still remains.

Without a pause each second passes by

Thoughts of you still lingers on my mind

Without a pause the sun still revolves

Hard days like these still have to go on

Like a needle thread sewing through torn rags

Plasters and medicines have no effects

Like stalks of roses slowly withering

Thorns of them still holds onto it

Endless tunnel ahead in view

The fear of tomorrows awaits through

Dark clouds hovered to cover my blues

Showers of water fills my hollow wounds

Wishing upon a shooting star

For happiness and bliss to be in your heart

When dawn breaks forth the lonely nights

Prayers for you would reach the skies

Apart is for the better of we

A part of your memory stays deep within

Together our days to go through

Together our lives have to move

Even the nights are hard to live.

Night.

1. Gary said i seemed very fierce today...dark aura i guess.

2. Finished test super early today, like in 20 minutes? Hope i can do well.

3. Bought a might mouse for my macbook. Cool stuff.

4. No appetite.

5. Sad jay chou songs.

Siansation.

Trying to keep myself occupied and busy...trying.

Really trying.

Even waking up is difficult, sigh.

i think i suck because i can't control my emotions.

i'm just so weak.

This is very painful.

It sucks to do things that are hurting.

But fear of the hurt isn't an excuse.

Congratulations to Mandy on her wedding :)

Took quite some time to figure out how to upload all the photos from the camera, lol!

So anyway, attended her wedding...hmmm quite an interesting one from all i attended so far.

Ruby and me were pathetically lost finding carpark D at mt faber park, and sadly the taxi uncle didn't where either so we were lost for quite some time.

Well i mean many others were also lost la, they took as much time as we did to find the place too.

But it was good in a way that we managed to see many people and catch up for awhile.

I even saw many primary school mates, hahaha!

But it rained after that, so many were kinda drenched, we landed up hanging around there until they decided to move back to sandy's place.

So it was like woah...so just hanged around for awhile and we left first.

Well although it wasn't as what it was planned to be, but i guess they would still be happy cos to me i think what matters is the significance of it bah.

Mmhmm, and i was feeling very tired...came home and was too lazy to do anything.

Glad that today is a weekend, can afford to rest.

Yesterday was mad busy, had so many plans in a day.

I think i can't TGIF anymore now, hahaha.

So tired until i couldn't wake up this morning :(

I love my barcode shirt anyway, many people like it too! :)

Btw, Nex mall opposite my house is coming up very soon.

I'm excited for it! :D Heard that it's as big as vivo city man.

But one thing bad is that there's a very high possibility for me to see familiar faces around, lol.

But it increases my convenience, i think i can just stay in serangoon for anything and everything haha!

Gotta prepare to go for mandy's wedding soon.

She must be feeling very excited now...haha.

Update more tonight.

Hope i can finish some of my work before i leave house.

Happy Birthday Alanna! :)

Don't have any photos of us taken together today now so can't post it up here.

But i'm still damn touched to see my photo on your phone's wallpaper, hehe ^^

Wasn't really in the mood for school today, two classes and i totally just felt lazy to pay attention.

Probably cos my mind's all filled with getting my project done or smth. Hmm.

Gonna be very tired these few days with so many things around.

Tmr's another long day for me...thank god weekend is coming.

And i just realised poly is all about gossiping and rumoring.

Guys looking for girlfriends, girls talking about hot girls and hot guys...it's hard to even not be aware of the latest news happening around us in campus now.

Tsktsk...so weird.

I have been a good girl today :)

I need to buy shoes badly, apparently all my shoes are going to die on me.

I am only left with heels, which is so not wearable to school and stuffs -_-"

Tmr: morning project meeting, tut, alanna's bday lunch in sch, tut, home.

Fri: morning lab class, ccn school event, lunch with ladies, mentoring, cell, home.

Sat: do elective selection, mandy's wedding, home.

Sun: church, lunch, home, study.

This morning was kinda irritated by a few incidents.

Shall not mention cos i don't wish to complain.

But other than the morning, my day was still pretty good.

I think this sem is more of like bonding time with project mates.

We spend like almost three full days out of a week together in school?

I think my group is pretty cool, although we have like all sort of people lol.

We went to haw par villa today for one of our group projects.

Very hot place, but suddenly came a very heavy rain also.

So hmm, it was a very adventurous outing hahaha.

Glad that tmr is a public holiday!

At least can rest for a day...still have loads of stuff to do.

My thursday and friday is packed as well...oh my weekend too.

Just received mandy's wedding invitation card when i came home.

My cute mum thought it was nothing cos my name wasn't on it and she placed it aside -_-"

So finally found it buried in at my house after two days lol.

Looong day man.

I think koufu at the palawan beach is so cool :)
I like the mini pot laksa!
Hehe i think that has become my fav local delight.

So tired now, another long day tmr going on project field study trip.

What a cold day huh.

My role for xmas skit has been changed!!!

I demoted from an angel to a shepherd...lol.

But oh well...not that i mind la...luckily was changed today if not awkward for me to switch positions if it were to be weeks later.

At least can do with audrey so not a bad thing either :)

& audrey's gonna leave the cell to uni soon! Sobs!

Will be even harder for me to meet up with her alr, sigh.

So so so...new week is here again.

Gotta tune back the mood for school.

Lazy lazy lazy.

Hello! My day was wonderful :)

Love it when people use things i give :D

Had been a good girl this morning doing my reports.

But it feels sucky when i complete so much but still have more to do.

Anyway, met up with ruby and had early dinner.

Clams are so nice, i wonder why ruby hates it so much -.-

But well, it's good that we still manage to meet up once in a long while and catch up.

Can't wait for next year to arrive though~

Although it may be sian for the rest of the year but time isn't a barrier :)

Howdyyy, my eyes are closing any moment but just hanging there to blog before i sleep.

Today had been pretty smooth i would say, but extremely long day.

Started my day at like 7am until 10pm :(

Lab classes all the way...project meetings etc etc.

Although i don't deny that i'm so so very busy with school work now, but at least at the end of the day i am still alive and kicking.

Going back to TP feels a little weird once a week now btw, haha!

Cell was pretty fun today, although i was like half hour late.

We don't have lessons anymore now, instead we're starting to prepare for our christmas skit for children's church.

It was super amusing cos everyone had to REALLY act and all.

I have zero experience in acting la...i mean i've never acted before in public so uh.

But luckily during sec school ruby was forever playing acting with me, so i have some lame experiences lol!

Gid placed me as the angel role, which is like the impt part *gasp*

Can't imagine i have to memorise my script for the next coming month, hahaha.

I think church is cool cos we get to have opportunities to do things in a more casual setting, and it is more of a choice rather than like how the outside world always does things - a must or need or forced.

Yeah so anyway, i hope my cell would do up a great job :)

Alright, goodnitees!

Weekend is coming...but nothing really to look forward to.

Spend the day mostly discussing on project...sucha headache thing to do.

I don't like researching man...so waste of time.

Now my days are revolving around school work...so boring.

Tomorrow's gonna be a very long day so i better get more rest now.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

At the end of the day,

I am still thinking of you.

Skies are blue,

Trees are green,

In the midst of my thoughts,

You are here with me.

Clouds are white,

Rainbows are colourful,

But you just got to know,

I'm always loving you.

It's just so annual.

I thought my november is going to be mundane and sad enough.

But apparently my december isn't going to be any better, aw.

My last two months of the year are going to be lonelyyy, sobs.

Can't help it 'cause i'm someone who thinks far ahead of time.

So now i'm wishing that the year could end faster.

And for the rest of the months, i will try to be a very good student.

It sucks because my motivation is quite dependent on my moods, which is bad i think.

But as much as i can i'll try to be very task-oriented once in awhile loh.

Ok bye!

Another long day, i'm dying from exhaustion already.

Can't wait to sleep!

Sooo tired.

I had an extremely long day yesterday *yawn*

It's difficult to even stone for awhile in class cos brain cannot stop thinking -_-"

Already stress in the day, at night dreaming also stress lol.

Anyway, had birthday celebration for branden and eunice's birthday last night with the cell.

Finally done with it, now one less to-do list on my mind :)

Had a good time, just that feeling very tired haha.

I know how to play monopoly deal alr! Cool stuff :)

Dry stuff today again, and after school heading for field trip assignment again.

Come back home do school work again.

Waseh this is going to be a cycle...or routine or whatever you call it.

Jiayou to me!

Waking up today but to looking forward to tomorrow.

Analyzing thirteen resorts in sentosa is madness.

Didn't do much today heh...have been thinking too much, need to rest.

I hope doing project won't be tough times for me 'cause i'm trying my best to love this sem :)

Anyway i've decided to end my 30-letter challenge thing.

Haha procrastinated the last letter for quite some time cos i really dunno what to write.

And i don't really like to tell so much of myself non verbally like that.

I prefer people to take time to understand me rather than me telling.

Feeling guilty cos i forgot to water the plants on behalf on my mum, lol.

Poor plants, they must have hated me for the past few days.

Feel like buying some games apps for my phone hehe!

I don't trust jail breaking.

Hiii. Today feels like saturday huh.

I was very very efficient today!

I woke up early (although an hour later then my own target) and did many things!

But sadly or not, everything i did was related to school work, hurhur.

Reports, tutorials and project.

Used much of my brain so i had a very good nap in the afternoon! Hehe.

Had a hard time reading through URA guides though...so annoying.

I feel very used by the school sometimes, we do projects to "help" all those companies to think of better ideas to help improve Singapore's tourism.

This is indirectly like free labour loh, tsk.

Cell was cancelled today(again), sigh.

So i was just free at home but busy doing work.

While i out just now to buy some food, there was this salesperson(you know those people..ya),

so he was trying to talk to me.

So i just told him i need to go, then he asked me how old i am.

I told him i very young, 16 only and he believed! HAHA.

So that was how i manage to escape.

From plaza sing to vivo, now serangoon also have such people, wapiang.

Today was boring, tutorial classes all the way.

Ended up having a change in my project groupings.

Well i guess this may be a better thing since i was abit relieved.

I think whoever we work with also the same, there's both good and bad.

But anyway, i'm happier with the way things are now! :)

No school tmr, yay~

My eyes are barely opening now, so tired from the long day.

I woke up very early but wellll...had a beautiful morning :)

Just that early morning i'm only half awake, hahaha.

Lectures throughout the day, last lecture i was dozing off cos really couldn't take it, too tired.

Tmr's worse...all tutorial classes, sigh.

Hope time passes faster tmr!

Mum's in penang now, so i thought i'd better use this "peace" at home to faster do most of my school work, haha!

Anyway, i forgot to share about something.

The poster/postcard i helped kyann to do for xmas event for church is already up!

Haha how i wish i can see my big work in church but too bad it's all the way at G2.

Too far for me and i don't go there every week either so ya...can't get to see it.

But i'm quite proud of myself la...like i can get to be involved in such huge event and in turn bless others also...good stuff! *pats to myself*

It's going to be the last school day of this week tmr so yay :)

I think i'm a very home-ly person. I like to be at home.

Like i would rather be home doing work than outside environment.

Mmhmm, my day's ending soon.

Can't wait to get my rest, toodles!

Can't help but to love you so much.

First time having an ang moh tutor in my ten years of studying.

Lol i must say they really talk with no commas and full stops -_-"

Tutorials are so tiring this sem, i think cos of all the concentration.

Sucks to sense my phone vibrating but can't read or reply smses.

But luckily so far nobody msg me during classes.

Oh well. Life's mundanely boring now cos all i'm busy with is school work.

So many assignments and tests and projects to do on already, sighhh.

But good thing i'm carrying a positive attitude, it's just five more months!

November Resolutions:

- do well for all my school work

- catch owl movie lol

- eat lesser

- avoid snoozing

Lesson started at 9 today, not that i hate it but the absorbing part was draining.

Used so much energy just trying to pay attention and concentrate. Not easy stuff.

Projects and assignments are already rolling so i also hope i get myself started.

I guess i do enjoy learning, just that the exams thingy suck.

Met up with kyann after school. She said i've gain weight!!! Gasps.

Ok lah actually i also think i did haha!

But she said i looked better and it's a good thing so doesn't matter lah.

I think by the end of sem i will slim down due to all the stress lol.

Mum's flying to penang tmr for a week, additional work for me at home:

- water her plants -_-

- do chores

- settle meals

- pick up her calls -_-

Oh btw, went to palawan beach today afternoon 'cause there was a break time in between.

Didn't expect that we would be free 'cause i thought we would be busy doing other things.

But well, we ended up there, so we went up to the wooden hut and enjoy the sea breeze.

Haha cool stuff, nice place to take some fresh air.

I kinda like TAS lah, just that i don't like the finding of rooms and stuffs.

Oh, and the weather. When it gets hot it's really crazy.

Ok enough of school, gonna rest early cos my day gonna start at 9 tmr too :(