as usual, the T word - tired.
i think this year i've been saying mostly "tired" and "sian".

well anyway, very busy this morning cos i just got a new old cupboard :\
dad helped me to shift over the other's room bigger cupboard with the current one.
so did some shifting around in and out of my room, then had to pack my whole cupboard.
was horrible cos 1) i just woke up for goodness sake -.- and 2) there're too many things.
not really ALOT but my cousin's things are like twice my stuffs.
but she'll pack it herself la, ahah.

then rushed a little to meet up with the rest and had lunch.
met and talked to some teachers :)
nothing much also, but the weather was terrible la.
v v v warm plus tired plus thirsty...felt like being roasted in the school.

shirly called and i actually feel quite bad cos every call she makes to me it always end up rejecting her in some way.
haha oops, but really sorry la i don't really feel like and can't.

caught movie with a few of them and rotted around the day with ruby and her nonsense.
feeling v tired now!
i want to sleeeeeeeeep.

long day!

went to church super super early ):
but managed to grab a bite for breakfast before the whole event start.
and now i finally understood how tiring it is for pastors(and perhaps teachers in sec school) to like, repeat lessons over and over again?
cos apparently i had been singing thrice for the sunday schools, and esther also taught for three times.
hahaha and we had to sit through for all three lessons(including yesterday once).
like whao, so gideon and us were like discussing that pastors had to fake and repeat the same stories and the same jokes over and over again like they never did before. haha!
so yeah, such people are kinda great man.

after that went to ps to hang around with eun and ruby and to get some stuffs.
went to do some shopping while waiting for them.
haha i think i'm very deprived of shopping also lor, due to school.
no time and always busy and busy. so managed to get like a glance around.

so yeah, still got lots of things to do and plan ahead.

yawn, yawn and yawn.

good morning world, i'm so tired :(

i'm still very deprived of sleep ever since school holidays started.
sigh haven't really rested yet..so much stuffs going on.

yawns.

don't feel like blogging today.
although got quite a number of things to say.

v tired now and i hate myself sometimes for thinking too much.
when i don't bother i really don't bother.
when i start, it sucks.

but anyway, i still love myself for being...you know.

tireddd.

hanged out with the ladies in town today.
and also brought my dearest yj to have a haircut! HAHA.
dinnered and went home while the rest went to rot around in the west.

long day!
tiring but overall ok lah :)

it's been so long ever since i read chinese words that when ruby sent me some lame msg i felt awkward reading it.
haha! so horrible.

very lazy to type msgs recently. laziness all revealing out now?

anyway, although exams are over now and it's holidays,
i still have tons of things to think about and do!
still busy somehow.

& i seriously seriously have to pack and clean my room very soon.
either today or tmr. gotta clear all the books from my desk! :D
and everything else also, looks so messy and untidy. not appealing to my eye.

last third of the year is always the best i guess...just like last year.
ahah, nice memories.

sian, i have this strong longing to get out of singapore :(
i want to just go somewhere that doesn't feel like it is "here".
had been too sian with studying and mugging and making myself so no life for the past five months.

cousin's getting a new honda car!
too bad i won't be back to be his honoured guest to sit.
aww.

Exams are over baby! :D

holiday period now..yes no more stress from studies for now.
wahaha.

my mum is very inconsiderate.
she is annoying and irritating me with her unnecessary noise pollution.
can't she give me some peace for only two more hours.
tsk.

she don't talk lately. she SHOUTS instead.
and i really don't like it.

tonight's gonna be the last night i am owling over exams until next sem already.
hoots.

*exclamations*

finally this stupid doom day is overrr!
FB was deadly, identifications totally gone case.
paper was mostly on wine...luckily i didn't waste my brain cells studying all the previous billion of stuffs.
but still screwed up a little.

iht paper was also not easy, a few qns also gone case.
oh well but i'm mighty glad it's over already.
had been don't know how stressed ever since yesterday until today.

very very brain drained now after two killing papers.
no more brain cells :\
so anyway, after paper in evening went to church for rehearsal.
i alr stressed enough gideon still down there stress me -_-"
ok la but overall went well.

really very exhausted man...i only slept like six hours last night(which is v little alr),
and did so much of thinking then now come back home still gotta study for rht paper tmr :(
sigh never felt so...i don't know...drained out?

ok gonna study now.

i think after doing fb paper i don't have brain cells for iht paper alr.
sigh screw fb, gonna die later le.

just hope today will end faster!!!

ahhh, so miserable.

ok goodnight.

stressest day ever.
tmd.

vin de table, vin de pays, vins delimites qualite superieur, appellation di origine controllee - french wine classification.
vino da tavola, indicazione geografica tipica, denominazione di origine controllata, " " e garantita - italy wine classificaton.
vino de mesa, denominacion de origen, " " calificada - spain.
deutcher tafelwein, landwein, qualitatswein bestimmter anbaugebiete, qualitatswein mit pradikat - germany.
wtf?!

no time study all the other lectures already, can't finish.
damnnnnnn.

damn stress, damn stress.
im going mad alr, just like everyone else.
screw f&b. argh.

zomg this is getting miserable.

9am until now still like, left a lot more.
i don't think i have time to complete fb already.
wine is madness!
i still have five lectures of iht to go.
sigh why is there two papers tmr.

V SIAN V STRESS.

SUCKS.

waking up now is becoming so dreadful man :(

anyway, glad that pom is over.
v proud of my own handwriting cos i wrote v nicely and neatly.
ahah, wasn't rushing for time so took my time to do.
seven pages of my writing...first time my exam paper handwriting is nice.
still rmb my words during o's were horrendous for geog and ss paper, ha.

so now here comes the worst.
FB! iht! rht!
dang, i think use finished my brain cells also not yet contained everything inside my brain.

sososo no motivation.

wah sian wah sian wah sian.
so tired.

shall not go blank later.
shall not go blank later.
will not go blank later.

ok amen.

sian, seriously hope i'll have enough time.
there's like so much more to study and the schedule's v tight.
studying is not easy anymore now in singapore man.

met up for meeting at tanglin mac in the morning.
hmm, church after that. service was quite serious though.

feeling v tired.
maybe too sian of remembering things.
i'm so going to just write in own words tmr.
as long as make sense and concept is there can alr, don't care.
it's highly insane and totally nuts to memorise the entire book.
well, although i do hope i can remember some of the stuffs.

monday - pom
wednesday - iht and fb
thursday - rht

can't wait for exams to be over, then can sleep all i want.
hahah.

Changes for the better are always ongoing, just that didn't say out only.
Just know that whatever is best, it's all for you.

V tired.

Sigh, exams exams.
Read so much don't even know got go inside the head or not.
The week ahead is so going to be stressful.

Memorizing sucks.

Sian ar!

don't want study alr. stress.
i think i stoned more than i studied.

goodnight!

Yeah, so econs paper is over now.

Haha, so qiao that andre happened to pick up yj's ezlink card out of so many million people there.
V got fate leh, hahaha all of us were laughing at her :P

Lunched and home.Caught in the scary rain though.
I was just like, at the next block of my block? So near yet so far loh.
I wanted to like run across or something but the thunder kept roaring and the wind was superbly strong(i can even see it),
and the rain was so heavy and the trees look like they can collapse anytime -.-
Sigh, so like waited there for fifteen minutes and ended up still ran across when the rain was not so heavy.
End up still got drenched. They should faster build the shelter at my block, until the road there.
It looks so much cooler and better. The indian men should work on it faster :)

Ok, time to mug even more now.
I still have loads to study for.



& I'm always here for you.

Finally the day has come to an end.

Don't know how I survived through this long day sitting only at my desk with books.

Seriousness level to the highest point man.

I studied:

1. abit of pom

2. abit of fb

3. abit of iht

4. econs & econs paper

abit is not abit, is alot, cos everything is a whole lot,

so alot of everything is just abit.

not bad alr uh, feel so drained out now.

Econs paper tmr! Jiayou to myself!

Neck was very pain today, don't know how on earth did I sleep last night -_-

Study and more study.

Went to have tea buffet after that with the ladies and I'm feeling so bloated now.

Stomach suddenly feels like an inflated balloon.

V v v tired ahhh.

Stress man, so much more.

Sigh, muggg.

Ok, finally can post pictures onto blogger.

it's been long since my blog had any pictures :O

taken just last sunday, although half of everyone there only

v nan de, caught me am-chio-ing

taken way long long time ago, bout two weeks back?

during iht lecture...was playing around with yj's phone.

& my deadly final exam timetable!!!

Blogger's still screwed and i don't like it :(

Study, study, study.

I am so so going crazy.

There's really alot to memorise, sigh sian.

Went out in the afternoon for awhile, & love ya :D

But was totally burnt when on the way home cos the heat was excruciating.

I've never never felt so hot in my life when walking man. Gosh.

I bet those people who went to sentosa today afternoon are like lobsters alr.

Constantly need to have food for me to munch now.

Be it whether is it that I need food to memorise or due to stress need to eat,

still gonna get fat alr.

Sian, hope to burn them away through mugging. Ahah.

& take care yj!

I simply love your voice man :D

anyway, broke the usual trend for the first time...i called first!

ok la, exception cos qad's v tired and sian.

i'm v tired and sian too...shall wait for qad's msg then sleep alr!

Siansation.

met up with man-gf for lunch in school, then went to library and study.

library is supposed to be quiet but apparently some people there were super noisy, irritating loh -.-

then went for cya interview then back home.

madness la, this two weeks is so going to be madness.

i need to upgrade my brain memory space to like 8gb :\

brief details of today:

• woke up feeling tired as usual
• breakfast at tanglin with the cell and was late
• ate the slowest cos i was msging and using the phone
• discussed some plans
• some guy called eugene made friend with me
• cornelius poked me and i got shocked
• pastor preached about friends
• was thinking and kinda miss seeing qad after and outside church
• appreciated qad's thoughts though, but was last minute so timing not right le
• wanted to rest when home but can't do so properly
• bothered by exams so end up here studying
• study week starting from tmr although it's only like for four days -.-
• feeling stressed and sian to the max

Ok, my day was just econs and more econs :(

Gotta mug all the way already, seriously.

Sleeping soon.

& i'm wondering how's qad doing there...

hopefully at least fine...relax abit so won't be too sian or smth.

Alright nights.

Dear diary,

I didn't get to see my beloved today.

But I hope my beloved is doing fine anyway.

Do smile and think of me :)

Misses you much.

Haha isn't that sweet?

wah sian...no mood to study leh.
no motivation yet.
at this speed that i'm going...really worse than a snail.
so much for chionging.
sos!!!

study, study, and more study!

Impact

seriously hated yesterday for all the suay and horrible timings.
it makes people feel so whatever for nothing. everything but for nothing.

very, very tired.

revision lectures were boring, like don't have much use.
not productive at all.

skipped fb lecture and my fav girl accompanied me.
lunched opp school after that, though somehow we got lost.
went back to school for pom lec and we crashed it(meaning we're not supposed to be there but sneaked in).
felt super uncomfortable and weird there.
but anyway due to fatigue i nearly fell asleep inside.
but still, love her for the company today. v grateful.

gotta chiong to start studying already.



do know that i understand you.
there won't be otherwise.

ok.
i don't know what's with everything.
it just sucks to leave things hanging in the air.

i wished i was a guy, they can forget and don't care about matters easily.

V tired.
(& it's just the start of the day).

Sian.
three revision lectures today.
haven't start to study alr stressed.

damn suay day.
seriously don't like it, v sian.
like all for nothing like that...things i do or say like no meaning.
haiz, feel so sucky.

busy day as well.
rushed to prepare for cs presentation and rehearse.
i was rather fine, although i was the last speaker and needed to conclude everything up.
everything was well until mr g asked me about the "others" during q&a.
so screwed that up cos i totally couldn't rmb what was "others" in our survey forms.
total siansation. but ok lar at least he told us still not that bad overall.
finally all projects and presentations are overrr, v v glad.

extremely tired.
zzz.

So totally very in pain day :(

basically stoned and did nothing the whole day.
sian, why did my mum had such genes.
but of course my brain was still functioning and listening to revision lectures(at least trying to).

cs presentation tmr, sianzzz.
i better make sure i don't wake up with a sore throat cos today morning there was a little alr o_o

my whole person don't feel right today :\

` got nothing better to do in the morning so went to school earlier
` ear was pain, throat abit pain, jaws were quite suan, and tired plus headache
` classmates presented cs
` found out econs coursework grade
` knew rht coursework grade
` got back rht test paper
` lunched at sugarloaf
` home

revision lectures this week,
studying week for next week,
exam week for the following week.



& i'm feeling moody.

So totally brain drained.
Had been studying econs today...sianz.

sleep soon!


:) >>> for you only.

while waiting for qad, i watched singapore idol.

omg IT'S DAMN FUNNY.

so many weird people!!!

thinking about it, it's been pretty long since i went out at night.

hmm kinda miss it...

i like the night atmosphere...esp. the night sceneries.

miss dinnering with you too! & everything else as well.

yawnnn so bored.

You know, i think i'm becoming a more and more worse singaporean.

Apparently last time when we were young during pri school,

we still knew very well those ndp songs and do all sorts of things for the country...

whereby in school we'd learn about singapore and sing all those songs,

and the school would bring us to the parade also.

Then slowly when we go to sec school, at least if we took social studies or history,

we still have to study about singapore and stuffs, so the bit knowledge is still there.

Plus we have things like national day celebration and stuffs.

Then as we grow older like now, the school doesn't do those seemingly "lame" things anymore.

I don't even know about the latest ndp songs or whatever was the motto was for this year actually. And I didn't care much about it either, oops.

Haha pathetic right, so i felt kinda so wrong to not know the country well :O

If the future and current young generations are like me then gone case alr man, heh.

Ok lah but at least i wore red on sat morning and i still rmb how to recite the pledge and sing the anthem. mwhah!

Ok anyway, went to church today as usual.

Organised some events for the kids during cc.

I tell you, nowadays children are really getting out of hand.

They are becoming so good at talking back and saying mean things and defying things and basically they're all very stubborn.

Luckily i wasn't the one conducting the activity,

haha i couldn't bother to entertain their nonsense.

But i think they kinda like me cos some of them approach me and listens to me. wahaha.

Branden was bravo la he finished all the leftovers! haha damn amusing.

Ps. ronald was as funny as usual today, he told us many funny incidents.

Especially the parking lot thing at holland v.

Lady drivers in the society forever lose to men one lah, and i don't deny that either.

Haha racers are cool :) although most are bengs but racers like one i know is cool :D

My mum was out the whole day cos she said she was going to don't know what...

sit on boat or smth? Don't really know what she said.

Cousin went to marina to catch fireworks herself...confirm brought her dslr cam to take photos.

And me? Stayed in my cosy world and study -.- hurhur.

But sadly I didn't study much lah, most of the time was just resting.

I realised I've actually got alot of housework...ok or rather roomwork to do!

Maybe gonna do 'em in sept. Everywhere's so messy, gotta clean up and pack some time :)

Feeling a little happier today than most sundays cos there's no school tmr :)

& your heart is still very well taken care of...or even better now.

be it yesterday, today or tmr, everyday will always be the same :)

don't matter too much about pictures,

'cause what really matters is the heart.

& i know your heart.

anw, appreciated qad for msging me and listening to me and talking to me.

i'll trust you :)

i wouldn't mind if you can't even if i may not like it,

cos you know i'll always accept you for you.

& that will never ever change ♥

Ok i better start studying and stop:

1. thinking of sleeping

2. eating

3. stoning

4. thinking of (don't-know-what) things

5. touching the laptop

6. thinking of msging qad

no, no, no and no.

don't msg don't don't and don'ttt.

shouldn't disturb so just don't cos people may not be able to do so,

cos prolly people are busy or unable to or enjoying so just don't.

aiya shut up and go and study lah.

Miss watching with you.

& my beloved person didn't reply my msg ever since two hours ago!

don't think will reply le so nevermind.

just rushed back home!
*pants pants*

cs paper was totally madness.
anyway, the lecture hall was so scary in eng school.
so steep one, omg.

i forgot to bring calculator,
didn't bring my watch and the clock in the lecture wasn't facing me somehow.
had to write so much somemore...and when i was like halfway mr g said left half hour.
i was like gasping my way through, chiong all the way until the end.
but end up when i finished still left with fifteen min -.-
and my pen failed me somehow, had to change into a pen that had been in my pencil case for ages.
and it sucks so much cos it was so ugly and thick and everything else -_-"

used the last five min dozing off cos i can hardly feel my eyes blinking.
haha so tired loh!

and here i am now back at home.
sian i'm hungry, and my house has got no food at all!

ok gotta go.
gonna see someone i've been missing much :)

gonna pant again!

vincent and i are testing each other now on msn but both cmi!
hahaha GG.

shall study on the bus, bye!

oh gosh this is it.
i'm feeling so tired.
still gotta survive 1.5 hours paper.
haiz sian.
somemore no wishes from qad...ahhh pow.



owl's sleeping now and i miss him!

woohoohoo.

hooter is back in action.

sian.
yala yala i'm still online at this hour.
shock si ren le?

happy birthday J!
actually i don't know him one haha!
but kinda related in a way so ya :)

i'm going to be so dead tmr manz.
i'm left with less than six hours to sleep.

sian, i realised my cs book is like the cleanest textbook i have.
ahah so much for stoning in class with textbook always at the wrong page :O
read through only cos like nothing to study... hopefully won't screw me up =\
can rmb then rmb, if cant then think of something sensible at the moment liao.
gonna write like crap tmr alr...boohoohoo.


goodnight my owl.

zzz.

anyway, seriously don't like the library's air con.
something wrong with them, they must have thought the library is a place for polar bears -_-"

went to walk around after school ended to get some stuffs.
i thought i board the wrong bus when i was going home cos i didn't recognise the roads.
ha, kinda dumb actually.

came home and rested, but unknowingly rested until like now.
supposed to be studying for cs paper tmr but...ha.
ok so gonna chiong now.

- finally no more iht tutorial
- had five pathetic hours of break time
- lunched at airport with my clique
- saw celebrities
- caught the hangover to kill time (miss movieing with qad though)
and the last part's more like m18 loh, although it was somehow nc16.
- went back school for pom tutorial
- demoralised cos my answer was wrong again zzz
- not very happy over something else(pom grade fyi)
i predicted that earlier...see, now really like that. zzz.


ok that's all.
time to sleep!

Have a fine day :)
& Jiayou ♥

ha, self assumption.
not gonna give a damn and get bothered by such nonsense.
go ahead and be ridiculous cos it doesn't affect me.
too bad some people just cannot think for their love ones and just cannot be understanding and selfless.
it's just too bad man, seriously.
oh well, i'm not going to entertain such childish thing.
you can go and curse and swear and hate and get worked up by yourself.
i've long gotten over such unworthy situation and still here living my life.

Bye.

Hen lei.

i forgot to bring my keys out today! gasp gasp & more gasps.
i didn't even know how on earth did i even left my house.
i think cos i went out with my cousin so she was using her keys.
crap man...really too tired today morning.
i was like having the shock of my life when i was horribly trying to find my keys from my bag.
hesitated to press the doorbell cos i thought probably mum would skin me alive.
but ended up it was on my desk. sigh, wo ye zhen shi de.

during break time my clique went to auditorium two to catch the muttons to midnight.
they came to our school today so we went to catch it since we're not in the studying mood.
they're quite funny la(if not also cannot be DJs).

wanted to go play pool but it was full so just rotted around,
photocopy notes and went for lecture again.
boring to the max, until i went to do something else and entertain myself.
she kept saying money money money and complaining she's not rich enough.
like hello? -.-

fb last tutorial later.
glad that the eighty slides lecture ended fast enough.
i think our class suck at wine lah, cannot even get any questions correct. haha!
who discovered champagne? it was Don.

jaslyn says she likes to hear me speak chinese cos sounds quite special o.o ?

i'm so not looking forward to cs presentation and summative test this sat morning.
booooo.

Ha, oh well.

of course i'll do what i say.
not an inch doubt about it.

The class laughed during rht tutorial cos they thought I was scolding mr fs when I was actually scolding Rk.

me: shut up la
some of the rest: haha eh he thought you scolding him leh
then mr fs looked at me,
me: no ar i was referring to him.
mr fs: i know lah i so old alr of cos i know~
HAHA.

but anyway, it was really irritating k.
I_________.


btw, don't know what's wrong with the housing development board.
the new painting of my block is getting uglier and uglier each few years?
so not nice lor.

and it's kinda cool to have people shop for me. haha!
yj and jas were at town and i was at home resting,
so i asked them to help me see some stuffs hahaha.

the weather's so deadly and i'm here trying desperately to do some work :(

subconsciously&consciously

Never will I stop thinking of you,
Cos never will you ever leave my mind.

Not a fine day at all.

Like as if i don't have enough things on my mind right now.
So many things happening.

In a nutshell:
1. finally no more projects, cleared the last one today morning
2. felt very uncomfortable for the whole morning plus in a foul mood
3. saw mandy in school, very surprised.
4. roughly understand the foreign exchange during econs tutorial today, but still quite stress :(
5. stomach felt very sick after drinking the stupid milk tea, never gonna drink it ever again
6. love siao char bo for making me laugh today
7. my manly girl-friend was talking about "yolk" today during lecture, quite amusing.
8. asked my mum if i could have a pet but she was still against it, sigh.
9. quite satisfied with econs project grade, at least those bushuangness was worth it
10. jaslyn was shocked i could speak chinese well cos she always thought that i'm the ang moh speaking english kind :O and she said my skin colour also looked like -_-"

But overall, the day still sucked anyway.

Although I'm not happy about those unnecessary emotions,
I just want to say that I don't want to be selfish and just stand out of it.
I don't see any reason why not when it doesn't do any harm. It's just but a small issue.
And, I don't like it when ignorance comes in.
Hey, do you know what is sensitivity?
Being conscious to self is not enough, spare a thought for others too.
Oh well whatever, I'll just forget it.
Ha, had been donkey years ever since I had such feeling.
But anyway, felt grateful to the rest for being there with me.
At least they understood.

Very disgusted at the stupid drink.
Better go get rest asap.

I can't pretend things were as normal,
but somehow it's just not the same atmosphere anymore.
I couldn't bring myself to feel the same way as before.
I know, the feeling of familiarity is still there.
but somehow, i guess...it's a different kind now.

quite an effective day i guess.

i finished my tutorials, yes.

but kinda demoralised cos econs was :(

completed my part for cs ppt slides.

feel so proud of myself :)

but vincent's one and mine the backgrounds are like totally opposites so uh...will think about how later.

and i produced a video for my church thing! phew, finally done.

it's monday tmr again!

i better get into the mood of mugging alr...sian ar, gonna be stress for the whole of aug.

& the week ahead would be a XN week!

Always here for you.

I'll walk with you through the crossroads,

I'll see you through every season.

I'll be behind you in every situation,

I'll stand by you in all of this life.

Even at the end of the tunnel, I'll be there with you.

I know it's kinda bad for me to say this but I still wanna say...

It makes my sunday a little better when I can wake up later and rest more cos I'm not going to church.

Yeah...shouldn't be saying this but come on! It's true!

Although it sucks to be doing school work...but oh well, no choice that's my job.

I tried looking for jokes and cheer-up quotes but apparently they're all so long and not very good either.

So end up decided to use my own words instead, more sincere this way right.

Although i don't really know what to say to make you feel better or smth...and I rather just keep quiet and stay by you but I'm not there so ya...

JIAYOU JIAYOU :)

no matter how sian or stress things are, just keep holding on 'cause you know i'm always here behind you! I'll be right here with you always, to see you through all the good and bad times. I'll give you my bestest support and you know I'll only encourage you and stand by you in everything. Work hard and work well, let me be your motivation to keep you going. You're awesome in every way so keep your speciality in you. Nothing is better than making you happy and seeing you smile. Maybe words are never enough to fully comprehend what my heart wants to say, but you know :)

resist resist reeesistttttttttt.

people are busy doing work and not very convenient so don't msg.

don't arrr don't ahhhh don'ttttttttt!

i feel like throwing away my phone sometimes.

!@£$%^&*()

i think my soul's still there with you,

haven't take back with me home.

zen me ban?

August's Resolutions:

1. clear all projects

2. summative cs test

3. cs presentation

4. study week

5. study hard for final exams

6. wash bag

7. take care of health

8. eat lesser

9. must save money

10. be a more committed christian

11. buy pen and staple bullets

12. stop being lazy and bring jacket to school

13. stop touching my phone all the time

14. prevent getting nags by folding my blanket back daily

15. don't disturb qad when he's busy

16. hope mum forgets about forcing me to drink chicken essence

17. have more QT and deeper QL! :)